Holding pattern
This little sojourn to the "cradle of civilization" is creeping to a close, and I can't express how glad I am of that.
It's been an interesting experience, and very worthwhile to me, but certain things have had to be put on hold, and though we always have a bit of inertia keeping us in a given track, it is time for me to flip the ship and accelerate out of this particular orbit. So the last few weeks here are bidding fair to drag out, emotionally.
I have some rambling thoughts on it that want out, probably much like a cat that meows at the door from inside, only to turn around and want back in. But for some reason it wants out, so here goes...
I'm no stranger to holidays spent overseas, often working. This one hasn't by any means been the worst I can recall: indeed I have a bunch of great friends and comrades here. On the other hand a bit of delayed maturity followed by some responsibilities to others than myself in recent years has resulted in some lacks in my personal life that I feel keenly at times.
I'm approaching my 20 year high school reunion. I have accomplished a great many things, and I have nothing to hang my head about in the company of my age peers, in most respects. I have a firm sense of myself, where I've been, and where I want to go from here. That's worthwhile in itself. It does make me keenly aware that I'm past ready for some other developments in my life: finding a nice lady, settling down, and raising kids and puppies sort of top that list. Odd for such a long term bachelor to express, I suppose. Many would probably look at my lifestyle and the fields I have played and be surprised by that.
In fact I'm a little bummed today because the very nice girl I met a few weeks back and have been dating recently has left for the States today. Sort of an unexpected thing- meeting somebody with at least little hint of something special between you, in a place like this. Not to overstate the possibilities or anything. Just a hint of the sweetness of life, like.
I have some other personal achievements that I'm missing out on while here as well. Nothing earth-shattering in importance to humanity at large, but things I want to do.
Like I said, a bit of an emotional wasteland here for the next few weeks.
It's been an interesting experience, and very worthwhile to me, but certain things have had to be put on hold, and though we always have a bit of inertia keeping us in a given track, it is time for me to flip the ship and accelerate out of this particular orbit. So the last few weeks here are bidding fair to drag out, emotionally.
I have some rambling thoughts on it that want out, probably much like a cat that meows at the door from inside, only to turn around and want back in. But for some reason it wants out, so here goes...
I'm no stranger to holidays spent overseas, often working. This one hasn't by any means been the worst I can recall: indeed I have a bunch of great friends and comrades here. On the other hand a bit of delayed maturity followed by some responsibilities to others than myself in recent years has resulted in some lacks in my personal life that I feel keenly at times.
I'm approaching my 20 year high school reunion. I have accomplished a great many things, and I have nothing to hang my head about in the company of my age peers, in most respects. I have a firm sense of myself, where I've been, and where I want to go from here. That's worthwhile in itself. It does make me keenly aware that I'm past ready for some other developments in my life: finding a nice lady, settling down, and raising kids and puppies sort of top that list. Odd for such a long term bachelor to express, I suppose. Many would probably look at my lifestyle and the fields I have played and be surprised by that.
In fact I'm a little bummed today because the very nice girl I met a few weeks back and have been dating recently has left for the States today. Sort of an unexpected thing- meeting somebody with at least little hint of something special between you, in a place like this. Not to overstate the possibilities or anything. Just a hint of the sweetness of life, like.
I have some other personal achievements that I'm missing out on while here as well. Nothing earth-shattering in importance to humanity at large, but things I want to do.
Like I said, a bit of an emotional wasteland here for the next few weeks.
posted by Larry at
12/27/2008 01:01:00 AM
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